What To Send As A First Text on Tinder

So here’s the deal: You matched with this girl who looks like she was sent from heaven.

Cute face, sexy but not too revealing, just what it takes to tickle your fancy.

But here’s the thing: you don’t know what’s a good first text on Tinder.

And you don’t want to mess that up because you know if you screw it she has many other guys to talk to.

So in this article, I want to make sure you understand what makes a good first text on Tinder.

What gets girls to reply to you excitedly.

What starts a great conversation. 

And what gives you the most chances to get a date right off the bat.

Today you will see:

What’s the very best way to get a girl excited (and that’s not what you thought)

How to come up with a top first text on Tinder

5 examples of a great first text on Tinder

Let’s get into it.

Be Exciting to Get Girls Interested

Right off the bat, I’m here to subvert your expectations:

What makes a great first text…

Is not only a great first text.

I really want to put the emphasis on this first and foremost:

If your profile sucks, she won’t care about your texts.

If your profile is great, she will forgive lame texts more easily.

Does that mean everything is lost if you’re not a blue-eye, tall, blonde, white, ripped dude with professional photos?

Definitely not.

But if you think that witty and funny texts alone will make it or break it, you are looking at this wrong.

You want to overall convey the impression of an exciting guy.

Someone that she feels lucky to talk to.

Not someone with an average profile.

Not someone who’d send her the same lame and boring „hey trouble“ as every other guy.

And that goes through both your profile AND your messages.

Get a Good Quality Profile First

Studies showed that most women aren’t using online dating to actually find a date.

That means a large bunch of the girls you will talk to on Tinder are just there to avoid being bored to death.

Now there’s one big problem:

If your profile is not good enough, you will only match with those bored girls.

And you will not get access to those girls who actually want to find a date.

Or at least that won’t be the majority of your matches.

And that’s a real problem because it’s impossible to understand what works as a first text on Tinder, or even how to have a proper conversation if:

You’re only talking to bored girls.

You’re only talking with girls who don’t really like you.

I wish I could show love to all of you no matter how your profile looks.

But when guys come at me with a blurry first profile pic with red eyes and tell me they think it’s good…

Or an awkward expression and a random background…

I have to give a nice reality tap on the back of the head.

In fact, check out our recent article about the best Tinder photographer tips.

Anyone can get good-quality photos.

Once that’s done, let’s get see how to make that profile exciting to women.

Make Your Profile Exciting

On top of making sure you put effort into your profile, you also want to give it soul.

And what I really mean by that is you want to show your personality and your lifestyle.

Before you even send your first text on Tinder she will already have an opinion of you.

She will already think a few things for example:

„ok he’s boring but he has money“

„hey he traveled the world and he’s an artist like me“

„this guy does not know how to take a photo and tidy his room but at least he’s cute“

„I love his motorbike and his bio is sexy“

The best part:

You control what women will think of you when they watch your profile.

And having a good first text on Tinder won’t really change that opinion of hers.

It’s 100% up to you to either send the image of a cool biker guy, a ripped businessman, or a 30 years old virgin who can’t tidy his room.

For example, let’s compare an exciting profile to an average one.

That photo is awesome and exciting, when you watch it you want to be there.

This one is…

Just boring.

I really recommend you show an exciting lifestyle and personality before sending the first text on Tinder.

I showed a lot of examples of what makes an exciting lifestyle in our article 31+ attractive Instagram profiles, go check it out for inspiration.

Because by the point you send the first text on Tinder, she will already have an opinion of you.

The better her opinion of you before you say hi, the smoother it will go right after.

Your First Text on Tinder Must Be Engaging

Quick question, what’s the difference between this:

(Find a screenshot of a non engaging text)

And that:

I chose 2 very low-effort first texts on purpose.

Because here’s the difference:

The first one closes the conversation

The second one opens it with an engaging question

And that makes a whole difference when you send the first text on Tinder.

One proposes a topic and invites her to keep talking more.

The other puts the burden of making the conversation out of thin air on her.

You Must Lead Your Conversations

When you send that first text on Tinder you really gotta be the engine of your conversation.

Firstly because you’re the one making the first move, so it’s kinda awkward to go up to someone to immediately stop talking.

At least go through with it and after you sent the first text on Tinder state why you’re talking to her to begin with.

Don’t look for her to show you signs of interest, instead, focus on making your conversations fun and flirtatious.

And secondly because, well…

I know it’s not really PC, but women hate to lead, especially when it comes to dating.

In fact, science shows that overall women tend to be more risk-averse than men.

That can help us understand why girls prefer a man who can be the one leading and making things happen.

Yes, even if she’s dying for you to ask her out, chances are high she will still not make the first move.

Do yourself a favor and don’t be phased if girls don’t make moves.

But then…

I still didn’t tell you what actually makes the first text on Tinder engaging.

That’s what we’re about to see right now.

Make Her Want to Reply

The secret here is really to make your first text on Tinder engaging.

And by „engaging“ I mean that your text must give her a good reason to reply.

There are many ways to do this.

You can make your first text on Tinder engaging by:

Making her laugh

Making her curious

Making her talk about herself

And this works on all texting apps, not just when you send the first text on Tinder.

So use it and abuse it.

1 – Make Her Laugh

While you definitely don’t want to become her Tinder jester, being fun is always a great way to start a conversation.

Remember our article on 7 tips to send attractive texts on Tinder?

Being funny works better when you’re making it fun for you first.

And ultimately if she doesn’t get it, it’s not a huge deal.

The intention matters more than the outcome.

Make Her Curious Over Texts

Here you want to basically clickbait her into replying to you.

It’s about sending a text that will make her curious or confused.

That will initiate her first investment in your interaction, and can even help you stand out among the most demanded girls.

Here’s my favorite copy-and-paste first text on Tinder, ever.

It makes girls just confused enough to want to know what I mean further.

And it also makes them talk about themselves which is another very strong point.

Make Her Talk About Herself

This one is probably the easiest way to get a girl engaged in a conversation.

Whether it’s your first text on Tinder or you’re just meeting at the coffee shop, it works wonders.

(By the way, check out our article on Tinder VS Cold Approach here.)

See, people are just so selfish and self-centered nowadays.

So we’re going to use that to our advantage when we send the first text on Tinder.

Not the most exciting Tinder opener, but case and point.

It’s commenting in a light way on something that was found in her profile (here, her bio).

That’s pretty much how you optimize your first text on Tinder.

But I know sometimes it’s difficult to come up with it on the spot…

So let’s have a look at 5 of my recent conversations so that you can steal my lines!

5 Examples Of A Great First Text On Tinder

Those Tinder openers are all different but you can see very easily what I’m trying to do with those.

They are either:

Making her laugh

Making her talk about herself

Making her curious

Or a combination of those.

1 – Comment On Something From Her Bio

Ok so let’s start by analyzing the very previous example:

It was very easy to comment on something from her bio.

You know it, everyone is so self-centered.

And the best way to engage people is to make them talk about their favorite topic:

Themselves.

2 – Comment On ANYTHING From Her Profile

So while the bio usually makes it super duper easy, you can actually comment on anything from her profile.

Don’t be afraid to be meta. 

In the example above my friend started the conversation by mentioning her job.

Which is as engaging, because it’s still making her talk about herself. 

(Think about it… People spend most of their awake time at work, so it matters to them.)

On top of that it’s funny and cute.

Definitely a win.

3 – Get Her Curious

Without further introduction, my favorite Tinder conversation starter.

(Use it while it’s still not too famous yet.)

It works so well because on top of making girls talk about themselves it does a few other things:

It’s broad and open-ended

It’s original

It has this “what do you mean?” effect that makes girls curious

4 – Challenge Her

Challenging people is always a great way to get a reaction out of them. 

Don’t make it too harsh, you don’t want to come off as insulting.

It’s way better to make fun of one of her innocent flaws.

Or to compensate for a tease with a compliment.

Either way, it’s definitely more engaging than “hey what’s up?” and will get you to stand out.

5 – Get Her To Text You First

Alright I know, I’m throwing a little bit of a curveball at you right here.

But did you know that men who receive the first text have up to 150% more chances to get a date with that match?

But how do you get girls to text you first on Tinder?

The answer is…

Get a profile that’s so good she feels she MUST talk to you

Make it easy to text you with polarizing bio and photos

Your First Text Is The Most Important

Your first text on Tinder will make a difference between a conversation and a non-conversation.

So make sure it’s impactful.

And yes, you can sometimes get away by sending „hey trouble“ like everyone else.

But truth be told, you won’t really stand out or get quality girls that way.

This article told you exactly what first text to send on Tinder, come back to it whenever you need inspiration to text your newest match!

And One More Thing

The way you present yourself through your photos will make everything easier.

Matching, texting, getting a date…

And what if I told you that you can VERY EASILY improve your profile up to 23% with your CURRENT photos?

I made a free video guide to explain how it works, click below to watch it now.